When I am walking in this tunnel, right from the beginning, it was a path from dim to dark. I see no lights, not even my own shadow.
Always there are blinking beam, tell me to keep this breath and march forwards, baby steps though, in mud though, dragging though....
He was the man that grilled me a lot, with me on the pan, he spray not only sizzling water but salt but pepper.
I was so smashed, or in BM "berkecai-kecai tu lah rasanya", to an extent that I told him before my birthday: I didn't demand for any compliments, but I don't want to cry on that day. I begged. This is the outcome when reading his comments, always. I admit that I might be taking things too personal, this is maybe merely his style, or merely something else, but nothing to put myself on this flak. I dried my eyes and moved on.
Until today, when I have almost done with all the ashes and patches on me, when we have finished with all five chapters. I told him honestly, it spells a million times in my heart, whenever reading his amendment and comments, he is very good, precise and details, to catch whenever holes that is impossible to find in my thesis.
He replied, I almost drenched myself in tears. This time, touched though. Not the "ouch..." that I had with him.
Thanks for the kind comments. Don't feel so bad. I'm (and I think Dr.R too) trying to give you hell so that you'll learn faster. But, please don't forget that at the end of it all both or us are on your side and we want you to 'win'. My standard is not that high ... only that I've a great advantage over you. When I grew up, I spoke English naturally ... everyone did so ... so our generation we're native English speakers, in practice, no difference fr the Englishman himself.On the other hand, I cant speak Mandarin which embarasses me no end as a Chinese. Anyway, don't worry abt how good or bad. Let's just get the PhD.
If you have already felt the touch, a million fold of yours, it was mine.
I couldn't express my gratitude enough for all the cares, encouragements and loves that I got.
4 comments:
That's touching :)
Somehow that reminds me of what my supervisor told me a similar thing, her background was trained in English, that's why i had a hard time with my writing.
Anyway, I am happy for you :)
Thanks,
I still have to pass at least two more "grills"....
Hopefully it is almost at the end of the tunnel now.
Awwww..... that's touching!
My supervisor also gave me hell last time...I also forgot how many times i cried during that hard time! I know at the end, she was on my side, she wants me to "win"! But....I juz can't took it at that moment.
Anyway..... after the whole process,the fruitful result will make u feel that it is worth it!
Every researcher has got a learning curve.... Hopefully joy and happiness awaits...
Post a Comment